Ballspende
We all use Ballspende pretty regularly. If you don’t speak German, Ballspende means dance card. The history of Ballspende can be traced back to the 18th century, but they became hugely popular in the 19th century. A dance card is actually a colorfully decorated small book a woman uses to list the names of the men she intends to dance with at a formal ball.
In today’s world, dance card is used as a metaphor for asking someone to spend time with you. If you tell someone your dance card is full, you are telling them you do not any time for them right now. There that word is again: time. I view dance cards as a blend of who I choose to have in my life, a little time management, and a little use of boundaries.
I do use the term dance card a lot. I mainly reference it when planning out my week around the anchor things I have to do regarding work, the rodeo, or other special events. Once I get my dance card defined with those events, I know what time I have left for me, other people, and other events for the week. I do strive to maintain an amount of flexibility on my dance card as I know unexpected events can happen. When someone asks for time on my dance card and we can’t sync up, I offer or ask for an alternative time and date (the rain check). That lets the other person know time with them is still important me, and I am looking for a time that works for both of us, and if they offer an alternative time, that also validates I’m important in their lives. Check your dance card out. Are you blowing people off without alternatives? If you do not want to see or spend time with them, be honest enough to say it. If you blow them off enough, they stop asking. If you want to see them but can’t get the times synced up, offer that rain check. There is always time on your Ballspende for those important to you. Remember that.
We all use Ballspende pretty regularly. If you don’t speak German, Ballspende means dance card. The history of Ballspende can be traced back to the 18th century, but they became hugely popular in the 19th century. A dance card is actually a colorfully decorated small book a woman uses to list the names of the men she intends to dance with at a formal ball.
In today’s world, dance card is used as a metaphor for asking someone to spend time with you. If you tell someone your dance card is full, you are telling them you do not any time for them right now. There that word is again: time. I view dance cards as a blend of who I choose to have in my life, a little time management, and a little use of boundaries.
I do use the term dance card a lot. I mainly reference it when planning out my week around the anchor things I have to do regarding work, the rodeo, or other special events. Once I get my dance card defined with those events, I know what time I have left for me, other people, and other events for the week. I do strive to maintain an amount of flexibility on my dance card as I know unexpected events can happen. When someone asks for time on my dance card and we can’t sync up, I offer or ask for an alternative time and date (the rain check). That lets the other person know time with them is still important me, and I am looking for a time that works for both of us, and if they offer an alternative time, that also validates I’m important in their lives. Check your dance card out. Are you blowing people off without alternatives? If you do not want to see or spend time with them, be honest enough to say it. If you blow them off enough, they stop asking. If you want to see them but can’t get the times synced up, offer that rain check. There is always time on your Ballspende for those important to you. Remember that.
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