Dual Roles

We have many roles in life, but two are certain for everyone: Problem & Problem Solver.  Men will get lost before asking for directions and a woman will ask for directions rather than get lost.  You did something growing up where your parents had to resolve the issue. Think about friends that get in a pickle and you bail them out.  There are three classic examples of problems and problem solvers.   I have a little different view of the roles of problem and problem solver.

When I have problems and someone helps me, I see the problem as a signal to change something and the solver as the catalyst to help that change happen.  No one has the ability or capacity to solve every problem in their life on their own.  We’re not made that way.  We’re made to connect with others and be engaged in life.  Based on my personal experiences in my 20’s of spouting that I did not need anyone and would take care of myself, I was internally saying, “my ass has been kicked and I really need your help.”  I recall going through a breakup where I became quite bitter.  I told my mother, “I’m like the Terminator…I feel nothing and nothing with hurt me!”  Yep, I was bragging about shutting myself down.  That was my problem.  My mother responded, “Rodney Wayne, that’s not son I raised…get out of my house and don’t come back till you find him.”   My mother was the problem solver by calling me out and forcing me to look at myself and deal with my issues. 

I am a problem and I am a problem solver.  Remember, HELP is a good four-letter word, and asking for HELP means, you realize that sometimes you are the problem and sometimes the solver.