In 2008, Dr. Albert Mehrabian developed the 7-38-55 Rule of Personal Communication. In short, the rule breaks down personal communication as being: 7% words, 38% voice/tone, and 55% body language. Profilers refer to the non-verbal elements, 38% + 55%, as “tells” or unconscious reactions like fidgeting, avoiding eye contact, scratching your nose, ringing your hands, etc. When your non-verbal elements are saying one thing that conflicts with your words, that’s when communication can fall completely apart.
To become a better communicator, start paying attention to your own non-verbal elements when communicating. If you find yourself getting conflicting messages from someone, maybe you are giving conflicting messages. Effective communication is an acquired skill. What did I say? What did you hear? I hope both answers are the same.
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